Tips for recovering from a painful divorce

While no one enters into a relationship thinking it will end in divorce, nearly half of all first marriages end that way, and the American Psychological Association says the percentage is even higher for second and third marriages.

Divorce is not just the loss of a once-beloved partner, but many can view it as the end of hopes and dreams that they have had since they were very young. Depression is a common side-effect for divorced spouses, who can struggle physically as well as emotionally.

Steps to getting back on track

Depression affects people differently as some will lose or gain weight, turn to drugs or alcohol or become isolated and refuse help from friends and family. Here are some tips to get through this transition:

• Accept help from others: Don’t go it alone and internalize negative feelings. Family and friends can provide essential and sorely needed support.
• Seek professional help: A licensed therapist can help sort through negative feelings caused by divorce.
• New experiences: Look for new opportunities to interact with friends and family that don’t include an ex-spouse, such as visiting a museum or taking a day trip.
• Keep moving: Exercise can play a vital role not only to a person’s physical well-being but provide relief from depression and other negative feelings.
• Focus on good things: Putting children front and center can make a huge difference for divorced spouses. Some choose to volunteer at church or elsewhere in their community which helps them meet new and like-minded people.
• Don’t fear uncertainty: Divorce forces ex-spouses to start over. Those who stay positive and are confident they will find their way will create good memories more quickly.
• Patience: It takes time to heal after divorce. Take it one day at a time and realize that some days will be better than others.
• Let bad feelings go: Understandably, some will have strong negative feelings towards their ex-spouse after a contentious divorce. Learn to let those feelings go, especially when children are involved.

Starting a new journey on solid footing

Divorce is something no one wants to experience. However, for some, it’s a positive step and a chance to start over. For many, ending a marriage can lead to a happier life and a brighter future. An experienced family law attorney can help former spouses reach that new and improved stage by working to find the best settlement possible.